Disclaimer :

  1. Original content and Not AI-generated
  2. For general information only.

Let’s consider a common example from society first for better understanding.

Girl child being bullied for her skin colour or body structure throughout her childhood and now she is say in late 20’s.
Someone genuinely compliment her one day.
“You are gorgeous” .
Now can you guess what goes in her head?

  1. Thought process become blur followed by question what is real? The childhood I have lived or this compliment?
  2. Insecurity arise. Any hidden motives?
  3. Anxiety pumps in. May be my makeup made me look that way? I should do more.
  4. Add on blurness, more running towards outer beautification, more chasing of approval outside, more pushing of wounds deeper and downs
  5. Wound is still there, she is still operating from childhood with more unclear thoughts of adult mind. All confused.
  6. Top of that Judgements received for chasing beauty, gold digger, desperate, insecure, unstable, fake.

Bottom line: she just discovered that this particular act (may be of make up) got her acceptance which she didn’t get in her childhood, the very wound.
Understanding she built is “doing makeup get me acceptance, let’s do it more, it is the way to get acceptance”.

May be her adult mind talk about inner beauty in group, may be she appreciates that in others too.

Can you see and understand what a cook tail it becomes of wounds, thoughts and emotions?

Can you see how two different people start living in one body?

An adult-child’s struggle feels like

  1. How to deal with childhood emotional wounds
  2. How to navigate through while you are still figuring out ways to see things as they are, accept them and not to see them through the lenses of childhood wounds.
  3. How to unify inner child with adult one.

What one has learnt can’t overpower what they have lived over and again for years.

How can you help the person?

1. Help them by acknowledging their experience, painful feelings, confusion and insecurity.
2. Help them to move in this journey at their pace.
3. Give them a realistic example from their day today life that will be easy for them to believe on and correlate with.

Acknowledgements open the door for Acceptance hence healing.💚
Pinch of Parenting 
(Nidhi Jain)